


Never To Be Whole Again

by BlackHunter666



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Gen, M/M, Sexual Abuse, Torment, captured Ronon, rediscovering freedom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-26
Updated: 2015-01-26
Packaged: 2018-03-09 04:26:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3236186
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlackHunter666/pseuds/BlackHunter666
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A dark shadow fell over Ronon as he rolled out of bed, ready for another day. He wasn't quite sure what was wrong, but something about today was definitely bad. All he could do was hope that he would manage to avoid whatever the trouble was. He dressed quickly, arming himself with the maximum he could safely carry. By going for his best offence and defence combination, he felt a little better about the day, but he still couldn't shake the dark shadow hanging around him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

A dark shadow fell over Ronon as he rolled out of bed, ready for another day. He wasn't quite sure what was wrong, but something about today was definitely bad. All he could do was hope that he would manage to avoid whatever the trouble was. He dressed quickly, arming himself with the maximum he could safely carry. By going for his best offence and defence combination, he felt a little better about the day, but he still couldn't shake the dark shadow hanging around him.

=~=~=~=~=~=

The rest of his team looked up in shock when he joined them, still concerned.  
'Ronon, it is a simple exploration mission, there is no need to be so heavily armed.' Teyla said with the barest hint of a comforting smile.  
'You're wrong Teyla, there's a dark shadow hanging over this day and I'm not about to take any risks.' Ronon replied, turning his attention back to his meal even as McKay paled.  
'Don't even start McKay, we're going and that's that. Ronon's gut feelings are not a reason to pull out of a mission at the last minute so get over it.' Sheppard snapped; cutting of McKay's tirade before it even started.  
'Is it possible that nothing will happen?' Teyla asked, wanting to calm McKay's nerves more.  
'Can't be sure. Chances are it's got nothing to do with anyone but me.' Ronon replied with a shrug, only half paying attention to the conversation.   
'Whatever happens buddy, we're right beside ya.' Sheppard added with a smile.  
'The best thing to do is run if things get out of hand. Escape and come back for me. If you stay, things could just get worse.' Ronon growled before rising and stalking away, deeply troubled. Sheppard, Teyla and McKay swapped a look before hurrying after him, all deeply concerned about what was happening. 

Ronon wore a constant scowl as he stalked into the Gateroom, the rest of the group scrambling in behind him.  
'Ronon, is something wrong?' Colonel Carter asked, pausing on the walkway when she caught sight of him.  
'He's got a bad feeling about this mission, that's all. We're ready to go.' Sheppard replied, casting a sideways glance at Ronon before turning his attention back to Carter.  
'Okay, you have a go. Everything will be fine Ronon, you'll see.' Carter added as the gate started dialling. Ronon looked at her for a moment before following Sheppard through.

=~=~=~=~=~=

What they hadn't expected was to walk out in the middle of a torrential downpour.  
'You sure this isn't what you meant?' Sheppard asked as they dashed for the cover of a nearby building.  
'No, but this isn’t helping.' Ronon replied, ducking under the low roof before stopping.  
'Welcome to Retoa my friends. I am Trival, village chief. I am sorry you have arrived during the rainy season, this will not let up for many days.' a shorter man called as he stepped out of the building they were sheltering beside.  
'That is quite alright Trival. I am Teyla Emmagan; this is Lieutenant-Colonel John Sheppard, Dr Rodney McKay and Ronon Dex.' Teyla replied, indicating each man in turn. Ronon was sure he spotted a spark of something in Trival's eyes at the mention of his name, but he couldn't be sure.  
'Come in and dry yourselves by the fire. You are welcome here.' Trival agreed before retreating inside, most of the group following him inside without a moment's hesitation. Ronon paused, sweeping his gaze around before turning and stepping inside, every sense on high alert for anything strange.

Space was made for them by the big fire pit in the middle of the room and warm drinks were pressed into their hands. Again Ronon hesitated before following Sheppard's lead and drinking. The dark liquid burned a path down his throat, warming him from the inside. He turned to look at Teyla, offering her a tiny shrug. She simply nodded, understanding what he meant. Apart from the rain, this place was nice enough; the people were friendly and seemed willing to be friends.

=~=~=~=~=~=

The rain looked to be easing off a little as the group rose to leave, heading back into the rain.  
'See, there's nothing to worry about here.' Sheppard remarked as they jogged along the slick path. Ronon shrugged slightly as a flash of movement caught his eye.  
'Run! I was right!' he bellowed, drawing his gun and turning. Sheppard hesitated until he saw several people hiding in the tree line before taking off after Teyla and McKay, scrambling along the greasy surface, listening to the gunfire behind them.

Ronon fought hard, mouth set in a determined line as he spun, dropping the people who came streaming from the trees around him. Sword in one hand, gun in the other, he fought on, giving his friends time to escape. It was easy for him to lose himself in the fight; a little too easy for while he fought the ones coming at him from ground level, he missed the collection in the trees until a small dart whistled towards him, slamming deep into his shoulder. He spun to look up into the tree, spotting the villager almost instantly. He didn't have a chance to lift his gun in reply before he crashed to his knees, tumbling onto his side in the mud, out for the count.

=~=~=~=~=~=

Sheppard, McKay and Teyla skidded to a stop in the Gateroom, glancing back over their shoulders as the gate shut down.  
'Ronon.' Teyla whispered as Carter raced down the stairs.  
'What happened?' she asked, looking them over quickly.  
'Ronon was right. We came under attack as we were heading for the gate. He stayed behind to cover our escape.' Sheppard replied, trying to ignore the fact that they were leaving quite a large puddle on the floor.  
'Okay, so why are you all dripping wet?' Carter went on, trying not to grin.  
'It is their rainy season, torrential downpours for days on end. We must get back and try to find Ronon.' Teyla explained, pulling her wet hair back off her shoulders. Carter nodded as she tapped her radio, still fighting to keep the smile off her face at the trio.  
'Major Lorne, ready your team.' she called quickly, glancing up at the control room.  
'Yes Ma'am, we'll be ready in five minutes.' he replied quickly, already on the move.

=~=~=~=~=~=

Ronon groaned softly as he came around, shaking his head to clear the fog in his head. Several things became clear as he tried to sit up; his hands were bound securely behind him, his feet were bound before him, he was blindfolded and naked. The cold stone floor chilled him as he struggled until someone helped him to sit up, resting his back against the cold wall.  
'Easy now Vallerri, there is no point struggling. Here, water.' a soft voice uttered in his ear, a cup resting against his bottom lip. Ronon drank deeply, still attempting to release his hands.  
'What is the meaning of this?' he snapped when the cup was taken away.  
'You should be honoured Vallerri, you have been selected to join the Ashira's servants here. Only the very best are chosen to work within the palace.' the voice replied, a body settling down beside him.  
'My name is not Vallerri. I am Ronon Dex of Sateda and I demand to be released immediately.' Ronon growled, shuffling away from the stranger a little.  
'Once the Ashira has chosen you for this sacred duty, who you once were means nothing. Now you are just one Vallerri among many. Those who came through the ring with you will never find you down here, you might as well forget about any life you had before coming here, there is no escape.' the stranger explained calmly and Ronon was sure he heard a touch of amusement in the mans' voice.  
'You underestimate my friends; they will never stop searching for me. They will come for me just as I have led rescues for each of them. We never give up on each other.' Ronon insisted, slowly working the blindfold up until gentle hands released the knot and hung the fabric on his shoulder. Ronon blinked a few times in the half light, looking around slowly. There were at least forty other men in the room, some were watching him intently while others ignored him completely.

They all turned to look when several figures descended the stairs and entered the room, moving quickly amongst the men. They wore nothing but a pair of tight, knee length dark red pants and a sword on their belts. Their chests were covered in a strange series of markings that were almost impossible to make out in the dim light. Some of the men had more of the covering than others and the one who gave the orders had the most of all. Ronon decided that it was some kind of ranking system.  
'That one over there.' one of them called, pointing at Ronon. The rest of the group descended on him rapidly, grabbing him and lifting him off the ground. Ronon fought hard against them until one of them slammed his fist into Ronon's stomach, winding him.  
'Take him to the Ashira's quarters and make him ready.' the same man called as the group carried Ronon from the room, smiling slightly.

=~=~=~=~=~=

Sheppard sunk slowly onto one of the bench seats in the back of the Jumper, gazing out into the rain soaked area.  
'Are you sure this is the place?' Lorne asked, easing down beside him.  
'Yes Lorne, I'm sure. We can't all be wrong, can we?' Sheppard replied as Teyla and McKay walked in, slumping down opposite him.  
'The only thing left is the fire pit. They just packed up and left.' Rodney uttered, shoulders sagging.  
'The question is why. Why did thy only want Ronon and why did they leave once they had him.' Teyla added, resting her hand on Rodney's shoulder.  
'We're never going to find anything in this rain. We need more resources to get this search right. We haven't got a hope of finding him with seven people and a Jumper.' Sheppard replied, shoulders sagging as he gazed out into the rain swept clearing again.  
'We will find him Sheppard. Never leave a man behind.' McKay reminded them all, looking up from the floor.  
'Yeah, we will find him but not right now. We need to wait and then come back and do a proper search. He's here, I just know it.' John agreed before rising and returning to the cockpit, staring sullenly at the results of the sensor sweeps.

=~=~=~=~=~=

Ronon woke with a start, face down and spread eagled on a big, soft bed. He tested his bonds experimentally but got no movement out of them at all.  
'The Ashira will be here shortly. There is no point resisting, you will not escape. Even if you could get out of your bonds and flee this room, you will never leave the palace.' another stranger jeered as a large hand landed on Ronon's shoulder.  
'I am not property. I demand you release me this instant.' Ronon snarled, straining against his bonds again.  
'You have no right to make demands now Vallerri and yes, you are property. As soon as the Ashira arrives, you will know this to be the truth.' the stranger replied calmly before rising and walking away. 

Ronon didn't give up trying to escape until he heard the heavy doors open again behind him.  
'Ashira.' the stranger said obsequiously.  
'Leave us.' a second male voice replied coldly. Footsteps faded as the heavy doors closed with barely a sound.  
'I shall enjoy this Vallerri and I demand that you do the same.' the same man said simply as he approached the bed, one hand tracing up Ronon's leg, over his butt and along his broad back.  
'Go to hell!' Ronon snapped back, still struggling. The Ashira grabbed his hair roughly, yanking his head back. Ronon guessed the man to be middle aged, with dark hair and steely grey eyes. He was dressed in such finery that Ronon guessed that Ashira was their word for king.  
'Be respectful Vallerri or I will have you put to death in the most painful way possible.' this newcomer replied as he released Ronon's hair and walked away. 

He was back a few minutes later, the bed dipping as he climbed up, settling between Ronon's spread thighs.  
'Do not touch me!' Ronon warned; voice flooded with venom as he renewed his struggles.  
'You don't make the commands Vallerri, you follow them.' the Ashira reminded Ronon, tracing his hands over Ronon's butt again. Ronon went back to his determined attempts to escape as the man eased his body over Ronon's, laying full length on the Satedan's broad back.  
'The more you fight, the more this will hurt. Lie still and it will all be over much sooner.' he uttered, pressing light kisses to Ronon's shoulders.  
'You will never get away with this.' Ronon snarled, trying to throw the man off his back.  
'That is where you are wrong Vallerri, I am the Ashira and I always get what I want.' the man replied, grabbing Ronon's cheeks and forcing them apart.   
"No! This is not happening! I am a Satedan warrior, this is not happening!" Ronon screamed inwardly, feeling something warm, hard and strong pressing against his most intimate place. The Ashira thrust inside violently, chuckling at the scream wrenched from Ronon's throat. The pain drilled through Ronon's body, locking up his muscles as he fought for control of his voice. The Ashira used every ounce of strength he had as he thrust into Ronon's body, feeling his blood ease the way.  
'Tell me how good you feel Vallerri. Speak or die!' the Ashira commanded, one hand tangling in Ronon's hair and pulling back painfully. With his whole body wracked with pain, Ronon had no choice, wishing it would all be over soon.  
'So good Ashira, thank you so much.' he replied, body shaking with the effort. The Ashira seemed pleased with that but did not slow his furious pace, scraping skin from Ronon's wrists and ankles with every thrust.

Breaths coming in harsh pants, the Ashira came hard, back arcing and an inhuman cry erupting from his throat. Ronon mentally swore that he would have revenge on this man as he pulled out and rose, disappearing and then returning a short time later.  
'Now do you see Vallerri, you are mine until I become tired of you.' the Ashira uttered, running his fingers through Ronon's hair before walking away.  
'Return him to the others.' he ordered before leaving, his long, deep blue robes swishing softly on the tiled floors. 

Ronon had no strength left to fight as three guards approached him and quickly unbound him before carrying him away.  
'What does Vallerri mean?' he asked weakly, lifting his head from one of the guard's shoulders.  
'It is the title given to all those that the Ashira choses simply for pleasure purposes.' the guard replied steadily, as if he were discussing a trade deal. Ronon nodded slowly, the world spinning as he crashed back into unconsciousness, mentally and physically drained.

=~=~=~=~=~=

Sheppard paced Carter's office in agitation, glancing down at the gate every so often, half expecting Ronon to come bursting through at any moment.  
'I know you want him back John but the fact still remains; the Daedalus is at least two weeks away and I am not going to authorise a rescue mission until I know that there is a chance Ronon is still there. I will however, allow you to keep an eye on M4R-632 to see if that village reappears near the gate. If it does, you and Major Lorne can take your teams back and see what you can find out. This doesn't necessarily mean that I will okay a rescue mission, but I can see you want to do something towards getting him back.' Carter offered, watching him pace restlessly.  
'Fine, I'll accept that. I'll take anything I can at the moment.' Sheppard replied before walking out, going in search of McKay.

=~=~=~=~=~=

Consciousness slowly returned to Ronon, his body wracked with pain.  
'Rest Vallerri, you are in good hands. I am a healer. Here, drink this, it will help.' a soft, female voice soothed, gently easing him up onto one elbow. Ronon nodded as she held a cup to his lips and he drank submissively, too weak to fight anymore. Even his years as a runner hadn't left him this drained. He collapsed back against the bedding, wincing slightly as he impacted the hard surface. He registered something wrapped around his waist but he dismissed it, refusing to accept what was happening.  
'Just relax, you will be all right.' she whispered, pulling up the blankets as Ronon tumbled into a restless and troubled sleep.


	2. Two Weeks Later

With the Daedalus back in orbit around Lantea, plans were finalised to investigate M4R-632 in search of Ronon. Four Jumpers and as many troops as they could carry, were on board the Daedalus as it streaked towards their destination. Sheppard gazed out the view port, hands curling into fists.  
'We'll find him Colonel.' Caldwell assured him, moving to stand beside him.  
'I know we will. I just hope that they haven't harmed him in any way. Ronon is a vital part of my team; these part couple of weeks have been hard, for all of us.' Sheppard replied, glancing across to where Rodney was sitting, staring at his hands.  
'Then get out there and get him back. I'm fairly confident that he hasn't given up hope of rescue.' Caldwell agreed, resting one hand on Sheppard's shoulder briefly before returning to his seat.

=~=~=~=~=~=

The only problem was Ronon had given up hope of rescue. He was broken, never to be whole again as he worked along side the rest of the Vallerri. He had no fight left in him as he cared for the newer Vallerri and tended to the injured men. He had been granted a proper place and now wore the traditional Vallerri cloak. It was made of a rough spun pale green fabric that barely covered his body. A silver buckle rested on his right shoulder clasping two corners, leaving the other two corners to flap loosely against his thighs. He wore it in such a way that his left shoulder was covered by one long edge, the rest of the fabric dipping low across his chest and back.

He no longer thought of the friends who had betrayed him and left him to his fate, no longer dreamed of Sateda or his time as a runner, no longer cared about the easy friendships he had once known. All that mattered to him now was keeping the Ashira happy, no matter the cost to him or anyone else he knew. He had been torn down and rebuilt; from feared Satedan warrior to broken sex slave. Ho bore the scars on his wrists and ankles with pride just like the rest of the Vallerri because he knew that if he kept the Ashira happy for long enough, he would be released with a good pension in thanks for his service. Anyone that left the Ashira's service alive was regarded with great respect for their achievements and Ronon was determined to do just that.

Even if his friends found him, they would have a lot of trouble recognising him. The tattoos he once wore with pride were hidden under layer upon layer of grime and blood; his dreadlocks had been removed to make him blend in with the rest of the group and he was now clean shaven. He kept his head bowed as he moved about his daily chores, blending seamlessly with the rest of the group now that everything that made him an individual was gone.

What Ronon didn't realise was that all his changes boiled back to the food that was delivered to the basement every morning. It was laced with a cocktail of drugs, designed to keep the Vallerri under control. Drugs to block their memories, drugs to stop them sleeping well, others designed to make the users soporific and yet more to keep them docile. Together they made controlling the Vallerri simple, a single word or command given and they would scramble to obey, no matter what they were doing.

=~=~=~=~=~=

Sheppard led his group along the beautifully paved path to the castle, guns raised. They were ready to fight to get Ronon back and no one was going to stand in their way. Caldwell had picked up a few traces of Ronon's subcutaneous tracker but never enough to get a lock on his location so Sheppard had brought the Jumper teams down and was ready to storm the fortress and take Ronon back by force. 

They had no opposition as they stormed up the path and through into the courtyard, filled with people. They hurried past them, bursting into the interior building, guns sweeping the area. Sheppard's eyes settled on an older man sitting on a throne at the far end of the room, several half naked men gathered behind him.  
'What is the meaning of this?' the man asked, glaring at Sheppard.  
'We're here to take back our friend. You kidnapped him two weeks ago while we were here on a peaceful mission and now we're going to take him back, even if we have to kill everyone else here to get to him.' Sheppard replied, moving forward.  
'I see, and if he does not wish to leave with you?' the man went on, rising to his feet. Almost instantly, the men behind him dropped to their knees, heads bowed.  
'He's not getting a choice. We're not leaving here without him or his equipment.' Sheppard snapped back, his team moving forward and surrounding the man.  
'Sheppard, on the wall behind the throne.' McKay uttered, pointing with his chin. Sheppard turned to look and sure enough, hanging on the wall, was Ronon's gun, sword and several of his knives.  
'Keep this one under close guard. I'm going to get Ronon's things. Even if I have to kill everyone else to get them.' Sheppard replied before breaking away from the group and ascending to the throne. The men on the floor didn't move a muscle, hands resting in their laps as Sheppard grabbed Ronon's gear from the wall, tucking the gun into his vest and the knives into his belt. He hung the sword over his shoulder on its harness before looking around again.

He found the rest of Ronon's gear in a small alcove built into the back of the throne platform and hastily dropped to his knees, bundling everything into his backpack except his clothes.  
'Where is he?' Lorne asked; glaring steely eyed at the man.  
'You will find him in the Vallerri hall, if you can find him at all.' the man replied as one of the men scrambled to his feet and moved to stand behind the man, head bowed.  
'Take these men to the Vallerri hall to find their friend. They are not to be stopped until they return here with him. Do you understand?' the man asked, turning to the submissive man.  
'Yes Ashira, I understand. This way.' the second man replied, waving the group to follow him. Lorne's team stayed behind to guard the man as Sheppard and McKay followed the servant down the corridor.

=~=~=~=~=~=

Ronon looked up in surprise as two new men walked into the basement bearing arms. A dim stirring of recollection entered his mind but he shoved it aside, sure he was wrong.  
'Ronon Dex, it's all right, we've come to take you home.' one of them called, looking around the room. Something made him gain his feet and walk towards them, head down.  
'Look, one's approaching us. It could be Ronon, it's hard to be sure.' the second man added, pulling a device out of his pocket and looking at it.  
'I know that name from somewhere but I do not know if I am the one you seek.' Ronon said softly, not looking up at them.  
'Let me see your neck.' the first man replied, pulling a cloth from his pocket and a bottle from his belt. Ronon obediently tipped his head back, eyes closed. Sheppard reached out and gently wiped at his throat with the wet cloth, wiping away the accumulated dirt and blood, revealing his tattoo.  
'Give me your left arm, just to be sure.' the man continued, ceasing the gentle actions. Again Ronon blindly obeyed, feeling the cool cloth on his skin again, revealing a second tattoo.  
'You are the man we seek. Here, get dressed.' he finished, handing Ronon his clothes. Slowly Ronon changed; the green cloak still around his shoulders as he clasped his shirt in one hand. The second man quickly unbuckled the cloak and threw it to the side. Ronon bent to retrieve it, but was stopped by the man speaking again.  
'Leave it.' he said, a hint of command in it so Ronon stood again, lowering his chin until he was staring at the floor.  
'I must not leave it behind, the Ashira will beat me if I do.' he replied quietly, looking at the precious cloak beside his feet.  
'Okay, pick it up.' the taller man agreed, watching Ronon carefully. Ronon knelt and picked up the cloth, slipping it easily around his shoulders and securing the buckle.  
'What happened to him?' the second man asked softly as Ronon rose, adjusting the fabric quickly but inconspicuously at the same time.  
'I don't know McKay, we'll find out soon enough. Come with us Ronon, there's nothing to be afraid of.' the first man coaxed, moving to the side. Cautiously, Ronon climbed the stairs, glancing back at his friends in the hall before turning back forward and heading up, a knot of fear building in his stomach.

Sheppard didn't know what to think as he regarded the once mighty warrior beside him.  
'Do not be afraid Ronon. We mean you no harm, we just want to help you.' he coaxed, one hand reaching up to rest lightly on Ronon's shoulder. He flinched away from the contact, his hands shaking slightly.  
'I don't know you, either of you. Why are you doing this?' Ronon asked as the reached the top of the stairs and stopped.  
'Ronon, I need you to think really hard. Do you remember the names John Sheppard and Rodney McKay?' the second man asked, looking up at him. Brow furrowed in concentration, Ronon tried to remember.  
'Sheppard and McKay? No, I don't remember. Should I?' he uttered, following them again.  
'He's been drugged, there's no other explanation. Give it time Ronon, you will remember. We are friends, we fought beside you before you were taken prisoner and brought here.' the second man replied, guiding Ronon back to the group.

The Ashira smiled coldly as he regarded the returning group.  
'I see you found him. I am sorry, but I cannot allow you to leave, he is my property now.' he said as a large group of guards raced into the room and surrounded the group. Sheppard smiled softly as he tapped his radio.  
'Colonel Caldwell, we're good to go. Leave the signal in the middle of Lorne's group, Ronon is between me and McKay.' was all he said. Ronon glanced at him for a moment before everything went dark.

=~=~=~=~=~=

The knot of fear in his stomach doubled in size as he looked around his new location, noticing all the people looking at him.  
'The Jumpers are aboard Sir.' a voice filtered through the air, startling Ronon again.  
'Thank you, let's go home. Sheppard, I think it would be a good idea to take Ronon to the infirmary, just to be sure he's all right.' one of the men replied, nodding to the woman sitting beside him.  
'Come on Ronon, there's nothing to worry about; you're safe now and back where you belong. Just follow me.' Sheppard replied; guiding Ronon from the bridge as the ship broke away from the planet.  
'You are Sheppard?' Ronon asked as they walked; his every sense on high alert.  
'Yeah, I'm Sheppard and that's McKay.' replied Sheppard, pulling something from his pocket. He took Ronon's hand and lightly settled the chain in it, curling his fingers around it and the two bones hanging from it.  
'What is this?' Ronon asked, looking at it.  
'It is your necklace. You've had it since well before we met. It might help you remember your past.' McKay replied with a soft smile. Ronon shrugged as he slid it over his head and looked at the items hanging from it.

Fragments of memories came back to him; running through the woods, terrifying creatures killing people, pain, fear, hatred. Faces came to him in brief flashes too; Sheppard, McKay, Lorne, several women, a short man with glasses who spoke in a strange language, they tumbled in his mind, fragments trying to connect together and form up. He didn't know what it all meant, instead turning his attention back to the only thing he knew.  
'I must get back to the Ashira; he will be most displeased that you took me.' Ronon said, looking around fearfully.  
'No Ronon, he won't. He had no right to take you prisoner in the first place. This is where you belong.' Sheppard placated the taller men, thinking fast.  
'No, I am Vallerri, I belong with the Ashira. He is my life now, I must get back.' Ronon went on before breaking away and bolting down the nearest corridor. He struggled to get out of the shirt beneath his cloak, desperate to return to all he had known. Sheppard sighed as he drew Ronon's gun from inside his vest and took off in hot pursuit, checking it was on stun as he ran.

He caught up with Ronon around the next corner and fired, nailing him in the middle of the back. Ronon crashed to the floor with a soft groan, almost braining himself on the way down. Sheppard returned the gun to his vest and moved to crouch beside Ronon.  
'Come on McKay; help me get him to the infirmary before he does anything else stupid.' Sheppard called, rolling Ronon over carefully. McKay grumbled softly as he and Sheppard hauled the bigger man up and dragged him down the corridors to the infirmary.

=~=~=~=~=~=

As soon as he came around, Ronon knew something was wrong. He was face up, bound to the bed with Sheppard and several strangers standing over him. His face fell when he realised that once again his sacred cloak was gone. He knew he was in some serious trouble with the Ashira now, or at least he would be when he got back to the palace.  
'Take it easy Ronon, you're safe now. You were drugged up on the planet we rescued you from so now you've got to get the drugs out of your system. The Doc is sure that you will remember everything once we clear your system.' Sheppard said gently, smiling slightly.  
'No, you have to release me. I must get back to the Ashira. He will be most displeased that I have escaped. I am not this Ronon you speak of, I am Vallerri.' Ronon replied, struggling against his bonds. Sheppard sighed as he walked away, his mind whirling for ideas as McKay walked in.  
'How is he?' McKay asked, looking from Sheppard to the bed and back.  
'Not good, he still wants to go back and is denying who he is.' Sheppard replied with a shrug.  
'I have an idea that might work. Come with me and I'll tell you what I'm thinking.' McKay added, waving Sheppard from the room. With no other options, the nurse sedated Ronon again, desperate to prevent him from injuring himself.


	3. Next Day

Radek's eyes went wide as McKay told him of the plan.  
'I am having no part in this.' he said, shaking his head slowly.  
'Radek, this is the only chance we have. It will only be for a few days, until we get Ronon off the drugs that were pumped into his body. Please, help us.' McKay begged, fiddling with the hem of his shirt nervously.   
'Why can you not do this yourself? You are closer to him than I am.' Radek asked, unfolding his arms.  
'He already knows that we are not important enough. Sheppard told Ronon that we were just soldiers and he's accepted that. You have the capability to handle this; I don't trust anyone else with this.' Rodney replied earnestly, looking up at Radek in hope. Zelenka sighed, realising that Rodney was right.  
'Okay, I will do this. You owe me big time for this too.' Radek agreed before he had anymore time to think.  
'Excellent, you won't regret this. I've sent you details of everything you need to prepare. There is much you must do before we arrive.' McKay added before breaking the radio link and retreating from the bridge.

=~=~=~=~=~=

Ronon's head pounded as he came to, tucked up in a big warm bed. He slowly sat up and looked around, the barest hint of a smile on his face. This room felt familiar, almost like home. With soft flowing drapes hanging around the bed and an intoxicating scent drifting on the air, it settled Ronon's shattered nerves and gave him a chance to relax. He slowly rose from the bed, noticing his change of wardrobe again. Gone was the pants and shirt he had been given by Sheppard, replaced by a simple soft yellow ankle length skirt like thing. Wrapped around his torso was an even lighter fabric, barely noticeable as having a yellow tint. It hung over his right shoulder down to the floor, knotted on the left side. Gently he ran the delicate fabric through his hands, amazed by how beautiful it felt against his skin. His attention was then caught by a large mirror on the far wall and he turned to it, shaking slightly in shock. Sometimes while he had been asleep, someone had taken the time to bathe him and now he shone with health, his tattoos clearly visible once more. His hair was now neatly combed and clean, held back with an elegant silver clasp. 

He was so busy examining his new look that he almost missed the door opening behind him.  
'Ah, you are awake. His Majesty will be glad to know this.' a man called from behind him. Ronon turned to him, recognising him as one of the group who had taken him from the palace.  
'Where am I?' he asked softly, watching the man fearfully.  
'You are in the great city of Atlantis, home to His Majesty, the great and wise King Zelenka.' the man replied, his voice filled with respect and admiration.  
'Why am I here? I have never heard of King Zelenka or this great city.' Ronon added, relaxing a little when the man showed no signs of coming closer.  
'His Majesty gave the Ashira of Retoa five of his best house servants in return for his pick of the Vallerri. When he chose you, the Ashira refused to hand you over so once His Majesty was home safely we were sent in to get you out. He is not one to be refused anything.' the soldier explained with a smile.  
'What am I required to do?' he asked, feeling more and more at ease the more he talked to this solder.  
'His Majesty wishes for some company. Ever since our beloved Queen died, he has been lonely and no one here can cheer him up. When he first laid eyes on you, kneeling beside the Ashira's throne, he smiled and the deal was struck. If you please His Majesty, he may allow you to bear weapons in his defence, but that is not a guarantee. Can you tell me what your name is?' the soldier countered with a slight shrug.  
'I have only ever been known as Vallerri. I do not remember anything from before my time in the palace.' Ronon replied with a shrug.  
'I see; then His Majesty will give you a name that he feels you deserve. If you ever need for anything while His Majesty is busy, ask to speak to the Captain of the guards, Lorne and someone will come and find me. I will go and tell His Majesty that you have awoken. Please, stay in this room until I return, you may go onto the balcony, but do not leave.' Lorne added before walking away as silently as he had arrived. 

Ronon smiled softly as he padded through the open door and onto the balcony. His eyes went wide as he looked across the city and the water beyond it. The magnificent vista stole his breath as he watched ships coming and going from somewhere above and behind him. He could just make out other people way down below him walking along the outlying areas in pairs. A much larger vessel was parked on one of the outlying areas, and Ronon knew that is was the ship that had brought him here.  
'Where are you?' Lorne's voice called softly from the door. Ronon turned from the beautiful view and headed back inside, head bowed and hands clasped behind his back.

Lorne was waiting just inside the door as Ronon walked over to him.  
'May I present His Majesty, King Zelenka of Atlantis.' he announced, moving to the side. Ronon barely had time to kneel before a shorter man swept into the room, several other people behind him.  
'It is a great honour to be in your presence Your Majesty.' Ronon added, staring intently at the floor.  
'Leave us.' Radek snapped, slightly uncomfortable with this situation but refusing to show it. Lorne and the rest of the group vanished silently, the door slipping closed behind them.

He waited a moment before approaching Ronon, watching him with a slight smile.  
'Stand up; you do not have to kneel before me. You are here as my companion, not a servant.' he said softly. Ronon scrambled to his feet, keeping his head bowed. He had never been treated as an equal to someone important before and it was a strange feeling.  
'Lorne tells me that you have no name apart from Vallerri, is this correct?' Radek asked, turning away and moving to sit in a large chair nearby.  
'That is correct Your Majesty.' Ronon replied softly, following Radek and kneeling beside his chair.  
'There is no need to kneel, a seat has been provided for you.' Zelenka corrected gently, tapping Ronon's shoulder quickly. Ronon lifted his gaze slightly, spotting the stool on the other side of the chair and rose, walking around behind Radek's chair to settle beside him, slightly nervous.  
'Look at me so I may decide the most appropriate name for you.' Zelenka demanded, turning to look at Ronon. Cautiously, Ronon lifted his gaze, settling it on a point over the king's shoulder. Zelenka seemed to think for a few minutes, gazing intently at Ronon's face.  
'I shall call you Ronon. Are you hungry?' he finally announced with a smile.  
'Thank you Your Majesty. I am a little hungry but I believe I have already had my ration for today.' Ronon replied, bowing his head again.  
'You were brought here yesterday Ronon. Go to the door, Lorne should be just outside. Tell him that I wish for food to be delivered and then we can talk.' Zelenka instructed, settling back in his chair. Ronon nodded as he rose and crossed the room, the door opening slowly.  
'Lorne, His Majesty wishes for food to be delivered.' Ronon called softly, scanning the corridor.  
'Of course. Has His Majesty given you a name, friend?' Lorne asked from his post beside the door.  
'Yes, he has called me Ronon, I must go.' Ronon replied before ducking back inside. Lorne chuckled softly as he tapped his radio and passed on the request for food.

Ronon returned to his seat with a slight smile, totally at ease in his new surroundings.  
'Have you looked outside Ronon?' Zelenka asked softly, turning to regard Ronon again.  
Yes Your Majesty, I have. Your palace is truly breathtaking.' Ronon replied with a nod.  
'Ronon, when we are alone like this, you may call me Radek. Can you do that?' Zelenka pushed, resting one hand lightly on Ronon's shoulder.  
'I can try, Your…Radek.' Ronon replied, catching his mistake quickly.  
'Good Ronon, that is very good.' Radek praised as a young woman walked in and set a large tray on the table before them.  
'As Your Highness requested.' she uttered before walking away as quietly as she had arrived.  
'Your people have a great deal of respect for you, unlike the Ashira.' Ronon commented, his mouth watering as he looked at all the delicacies on the table before him.  
'Treat people with a gentle hand and they will willing do anything you ask of them. Eat Ronon, you need to gain strength.' Radek replied, adjusting his position a little as he pressed a small button on the underside of the chair arm.  
'Yes Your Highness?' Lorne asked, opening the door.  
'Tell the people that I will eat in the great hall tomorrow night. They all deserve to see Ronon.' Radek replied, smiling warmly as he regarded Ronon, still waiting patiently.  
'As Your Majesty wishes.' Lorne added before disappearing from sight again.

Radek sighed as he turned his attention back to Ronon and the food.  
'Eat Ronon, there is nothing to worry about here.' he repeated, delicately picking up a small piece of meat and popping it into his mouth. Ronon nodded before taking a piece for fruit and chewing slowly.  
'There is no need to starve yourself Ronon; we have plenty to eat here. The Ashira does not take good care of his Vallerri but I will. Eat until you are fulfilled.' Radek urged, picking up one of the crystal goblets and sampling the delicious red wine that Caldwell had brought back from earth.  
'Thank you for your generosity Radek, it had been too long since I was truly satisfied.' Ronon replied, selecting a piece of meat and chewing slowly.  
'You no longer need to worry about that Ronon. I take good care of everyone within the city. You shall receive the best food, medical care and whatever else you desire.' Radek added, sampling the various fruits happily.

=~=~=~=~=~=

That night, as Ronon helped Radek prepare for bed, something occurred to him that he had never had to think about while he was a Vallerri.  
'Where am I to sleep?' he asked softly, hanging Radek's beautiful blue outfit up carefully. The fitted sleeveless top had a large selection of pale green gems running along the edges of the sleeves, along the bottom edge and around the chest. A line of much larger gems ran down the front of the skirt, with the smaller gems around the top and bottom edges. The skirt was held in place by a simple brown leather belt with a small dagger on the right hip. Ronon also very neatly wrapped the throngs of Radek's sandals around the shoes before tucking them into the closet, closing the door silently. Lorne had already secured Radek's fine crown, bracelets and armbands in a locked chest at the far end of the room and Ronon had spotted at least two other crowns safely tucked inside as well as many other fine pieces of gold jewellery.  
'Separate quarters have been prepared for you, just through that door there.' Radek replied, indicating a door near the bed that almost blended into the wall.   
'Thank you.' Ronon added as he settled Radek into bed, neatening up the covers.  
'Sleep Ronon, you have a busy day tomorrow. The royal tailor will be by in the morning to fit you for a new wardrobe and then we can take a walk.' Radek urged, setting his glasses on the bedside table and rolling over.  
'Of course. Goodnight Your Majesty.' Ronon replied before turning off the lights and vanishing through into his own room. 

It was much smaller but by no means any less beautiful. Soft blue curtains hung around the bed and there was a small closet over on the far wall. Ronon smiled sleepily as he released his hair and set the clasp on the bedside table before switching off the lights and crawling into bed, asleep within moments.


	4. Next Morning

Ronon smiled as he awoke, stretching luxuriously amongst the clean sheets.  
'Hold still please.' a woman said, sounding slightly annoyed.  
'You seemed so peaceful Ronon; I did not wish to wake you when the royal tailor arrived. Just lay still until she finishes.' Zelenka added, from the other room. Ronon nodded and relaxed, letting the woman work. She wrote down the last measurements and rose.  
'I believe we have something that will do just perfectly. It should be ready by this afternoon.' she reported before walking out silently.  
'In the meantime Ronon, there will be a clean outfit for you in the closet and some shoes. Hurry now, breakfast has already been delivered.' Radek added, returning to his chair. Ronon opened the closet and hurriedly dressed before taking his place beside Radek. 

They ate in silence, lost in their thoughts until Radek turned to Ronon.  
'Look under your stool, you should find a special gift.' Radek instructed, munching happily on his toast. Ronon did as he was bidden, pulling out a leather belt and holster with a gun already there.  
'Even though there is peace here, problems do arise. I would feel much safer if you were armed.' Radek explained as Ronon stood, buckling the belt into place and lashing the end of the holster around his leg, finding several holes in the fabric to allow for the gun to be secured properly.  
'Thank you for trusting me Sire, I will not let you down.' Ronon replied, suddenly remembering another term of respect he had picked up in his time underground with the Vallerri.  
'You are uncomfortable calling by name, is this correct Ronon?' Radek asked, sipping his wine.  
'I am a little Sire; I believe that in order to prevent problems later, I need to keep my distance.' Ronon replied honestly, averting his gaze.  
'As you wish Ronon, I do not wish to make you uncomfortable. Come now, eat up and we can go for a walk.' Radek offered with a smile. Ronon nodded as he ate, several memories pushing for attention but he ignored them, more interested in finding out about this place.

=~=~=~=~=~=

The little prods from the back of his mind became more and more insistent as he walked the corridors with Zelenka, always half a step behind and to the right hand side. Everyone they passed bowed or curtsied, murmurs of Your Highness filling Ronon's ears with every step.  
'It is so beautiful here Sire, never before have I seen anything so mesmerizing.' Ronon added as they walked, ignoring most of the people around them.  
'My people are safe from the Wraith here so we are able to expand our knowledge without fear.' Zelenka replied with a smile, waving in acknowledgement of a small group of people gathered in one of the rooms.  
'How many people live here?' Ronon asked, smiling warmly at a pretty blonde woman in the corridor.  
'There are about 200 hundred of my people here. We are a young people but we manage.' Radek answered, guiding Ronon into one of the transporters and whisking him away to a different section of the city.


	5. That Evening

Ronon dressed carefully, not wishing to damage the beautiful new garments so lovingly created just for him. Dark blue trousers, light blue long sleeved shirt, black boots and brown belt. Everything was laid out neatly on his bed, ready to go. A blue-grey cloak hung over the back of his chair too, a golden chain clipped to the sides. He eased it over his head, settling it comfortably over his shoulders. It gripped his shoulders lightly but left his arms free, in case of emergency.  
'Are you ready Ronon?' Zelenka called from next door.  
'Yes Sire, coming now.' Ronon replied, holstering his gun as he strode through into Zelenka's quarters. He was standing there in a teal green short sleeved tunic, a beautiful crown perched upon his head. Blue jewels ran in three lines across the king's chest, catching the light in a dazzling display that matched beautifully with the gold embroidery on the lower half of the outfit. On his feet were a soft pair of low cut black bootees, stopping just below his ankles. Lorne was waiting just inside the door, moving back only when Radek walked off, his long purple cloak dragging on the floor. This crown was much more stunning that the simple one that he had seen earlier in the day. Ronon fell easily into step beside him, relaxed and comfortable. 

Everyone rose as they walked into the great hall, bowing and curtsying deeply. Radek smiled as he took his place at the raised table at the far end of the hall, Ronon sitting at his right. The servers calmly walked up to the raised table, placing trays of food before Radek and Ronon before retreating to serve the rest of the gathering.  
'Eat Ronon; they will not start until we do.' Zelenka uttered, picking up several pieces of meat and setting them on his plate. Ronon nodded before offering Radek one of the salads, waiting until the king had been served before taking his own portions.

The meal passed in relative silence with soft music drifting around the room. Ronon smiled as he looked around, recognising some of the faces from his walk earlier that day. Some of them returned his gaze, smiling warmly in greeting. Radek watch Ronon out of the corner of his eye, a soft smile on his face. He was more comfortable with this idea now but he didn't know how much longer he could keep it up. Carter caught his eye briefly and he offered her an apologetic smile, understanding what she was thinking. She hadn't liked the idea much either, but she understood that it was the gentlest way to get Ronon back to normal.

Ronon was about to take another bite when he pitched forward, clasping at his head. One of the women leapt to her feet and rushed forward.  
'Easy Ronon, I am the king's personal physician. What ails you?' she asked, running her hand lightly over his arm. Ronon groaned; rocking slightly as thousands of memories came flooding back into his head. Everything from before his kidnapping and the torment during those couple of weeks tumbled in his mind, before suddenly they stopped. Ronon looked up slowly and glanced around the room, recognising everything again. Slowly he rose to his feet, looking down at his outfit.  
'Ronon?' Radek asked softly, looking up at him. Ronon turned his attention to the shorter man and blinked stupidly for a few moments.

Everyone froze; waiting to see what was about to happen as Ronon looked over the group.  
'Okay, whose half-baked idea was this?' he demanded, gaze drifting around the room.  
'Ronon, you're back?' Sheppard asked, rising to his feet.  
'Yeah, I'm back. What a rush.' Ronon replied, shaking his head slowly.  
'It was my idea Ronon. This was the kindest way to help you clear the drugs out of your system.' McKay added, also rising. Ronon nodded as he walked around the table and down from the raised platform, stopping in front of McKay and Sheppard.  
'Thank you, both of you. I knew you would come for me, I never gave up hope until they made me forget completely.' he uttered, resting his hands on their shoulders.  
'Anytime buddy, anytime.' McKay replied with a grin.  
'Now can I get back to work?' Zelenka asked, rising to his feet.  
'Yeah Doc, you can get back to work. I've got to hand it to you though, you pulled it off better than I expected.' Sheppard answered with a soft chuckle. Zelenka nodded and walked out, muttering under his breath.  
'You guys went to all this trouble just to help me get off the drugs those people slipped me? I never realised that you would go to such extreme lengths for me.' Ronon added, smiling softly.  
'We are family Ronon; there is nothing we wouldn't do for you. This is your home.' Teyla remarked, rising slowly to her feet.  
'I can never thank you enough for getting me out of that place; I never thought I would see daylight again.' Ronon uttered, smiling warmly at Teyla.  
'Go and get changed Ronon, you just don't look right. This is not the first time I've gone to extraordinary lengths to save one of my friends.' Carter broke in with a soft giggle. Ronon looked down at his outfit again and nodded, slipping the cloak off his shoulders.  
'That sounds like a good idea, I'll be back and I expect there to be food left McKay.' Ronon agreed before walking off, still reeling from the shock of what had happened during the last few weeks.

=~=~=~=~=~=~=~=~=~=~=

Things went back to some semblance of normality after that. Ronon and Zelenka shared a few laughs about what they had gone through together and Zelenka confessed about how uncomfortable the whole thing had made him feel. 

M4R-632 was removed from the computer, no one wanted to risk going back there again, not after everything Ronon had gone through. Sheppard and Lorne had a laugh about it too, agreeing that swapping roles was way too weird. 

Teyla saw the pain in Ronon's eyes and tried to be supportive but he always turned away from her, too ashamed of what had happened to let her know even the smallest details of his torment. Sheppard accepted the changes cautiously, knowing there was nothing he could do to make Ronon release his burden to anyone else. All he could do was offer Ronon a hand in friendship and an open ear if he ever needed it. He remembered the way Ronon had flinched away from contact when they had first rescued him but knew better than to force the issue, having seen the deep seated anger in the Satedan's eyes. Sam also saw the anger and pain in Ronon's eyes but she knew better than to get involved, remembering all the times that Teal'c had gotten into trouble and needed help to get back on his feet. She had a new level of respect for the man too, seeing the way he battled to put the pain behind him and move on with life.

Ronon never told anyone about the two weeks he was a prisoner. Every time anyone asked, he would just turn away, telling them that some things are better left unspoken. What parts he did remember plagued his dreams for a long time to come, leaving him drenched in sweat and gasping for breath. His temper was a lot shorter now but no one missed the way he would glance over his shoulder every so often. Everything he had been through brought about changes and he knew deep down, in the pit of his heart that he would never be the same man again. The events that had happened on M4R-632 had broken something inside and he knew he would never be able to rebuild himself.


End file.
